Showing posts with label grandma. Show all posts
Showing posts with label grandma. Show all posts

Monday, August 9, 2010

Oh My Monday

On Mondays, it’s hard not to feel at least a little bit overwhelmed by the Sisyphusian task of pushing another week up the mountain. But it is nice to remember and to be reminded that there are Mad Decent block parties out there, and that it’s not all company-wide Q3 earnings report review meetings and getting that file on someone’s desk by 3PM.

You know what, sometimes you strap on your fanny pack and head down to the boardwalk and dance in a way that is both unexpected and delightful. And as “Grandma Tracy” shows us, sometimes you do this until you are 1,000 years old. Let’s hope. And LET’S GO!

Sunday, August 1, 2010

It Started, and it Continues

This ain’t your grandma’s rave! Oh, wait, yes it is…

-David

Friday, January 29, 2010

Grandmas Just Don't Understand

I think Grandma has a point here. Looking at his room the naked babe poster sort of screams Sex Offender. And also whispers Virgin.

-David

Sunday, January 24, 2010

The Future is Now

As we draw closer to our inevitably horrific deaths in 2012, we can take heart that some sweet things have happened here on Earth. Avatar came out and was sweet, we got two Twilight movies and it looks like Virtual Reality technology is finally at a point where Grandmas can be tricked into thinking they are an actual roller coaster, when they are really on a bench going nowhere.

-David

Thursday, June 25, 2009

UNICORN MEMAW


I recently celebrated my surrogate Memaw's 90th bday, and it occurred to me that I have never google image searched 'Memaw." Are you joking me? How is that possible? Well, I got down on it last night and after like the 25th page, I came across this Memaw that grew a mad long horn on her head. The craziest part is that this 69 year old Memaw noticed it growing 20 years ago! I guess at some point we all just have to accept our flaws and say to hell with it all.

Friday, May 1, 2009

Duplex of of Wax

Actually my building isn't really a duplex but you get the idea. Sadly the Hollywood Wax Museum is going out of business. And or already went out of business.
I loved going to the wax museum as a child. My Grandma Betty Ann would always take me to the one in buena park when she was in town and or the San Francisco one when we were visiting up north.
The best part was when they would have some guy in a bellhop costume stand with the wax figures pretending to be one and then he'd jump out and scare you. Grandma would scream bloody murder and then throw a fit every time. Then she'd buy us one of those felt posters with our faces digitally imposed on the bodies of the cast of baywatch.
She would let us spend as much time as we wanted in the gift shop while she stood outside and smoked her Virginia slims. I miss you grandma...your visits were the best.

Anywayz these well executed yet inaccurate figures are standing in some massive creepy fridge some whur in the valley. waiting to be family owned.
lucky for all the weirdo's out there (ourselves and anyone reading this blog) they are now auctioning them off...
The picture above is an example of what my bedroom would look like if i wasn't a broke SOB. It features Dolly, Mcaulay Culkin (yea i know creep town) and good ol Rodney Dangerfield.
This would be a different picture (x-rated) if they had the three amigo's or something.

So there you go. Now even you could own your very own Brad Pitt from legends of the fall. Or Willie Nelson or president Richard Nixon. Most auctions are starting from 1 to 2 grand. Go ahead pick up a jesus resurrected for your auntie or the fonz for your cousin. They are going for chump change. (Some shoes not included)
hollywood wax museum auction
The auction house does not take resposiblitity for wax figures coming to life in the middle of the night and killing you.
happy bidding !

*sarah



Monday, March 23, 2009

Squackin Sweaters





Aw man- the Internet. Why did you have to go show me this? I was just googling for cute Grandmas- I didn't mean to find CUTE CHICKENS. And cute chickens wearing sweaters. Shoot.I got more then I bargained for. Now I'm gonna feel guilty all day as I eat my chicken (don't get it twisted, I will still be eating my chickens).
-David

Some Benjamin Buttons Sh*t

Sneak a peek at the movie magic that made Brad Pitt mad old for  the Benjamin Button movie. I tell you what, I dont care how old Brad Pitt gets- he looks delish to me (even with that beret he is always wearing).
-David

Meow Mix


Quit complaining about old people because they are racist or smell like a hospital or because they might remind you of your own mortality. Remember that they've reached the age where the don't give a hoot what you or anyone things. Old people are the best and can do whatever they want.
Maybe they do eat catfood, its because its cheap (great for those on a fixed income) and its easy to prepare.
-David