Sleep My Child

This is also the only way I can fall asleep, by having that guy jam his filthy thumb in my mouth.

-David

You Want Cats?

Of course you want cats.

Cats for sale! Hot cats for sale! If you live in the Winnipeg area and you have been waiting for JUST THE RIGHT MOMENT to get into cat hoarding or you simply have holes in your couch, now is the perfect time to buy!

-David

BREAKING NEWS: CAT HICCUPS THEN FARTS!

We will continue to bring you updates on this story as they occur.


-David

Not trying to start any trouble, but that cat is too long. Seriously. It’s too long! Whatever. Don’t get so mad when someone tells you the truth. (Via Urlesque.)
-David

Not Mad at Dat

Cache Rules Everything Around Me from Evan Roth on Vimeo.

There are two (and only two, probably) things that I like in this world: Girl Talk and animated GIFS. So you can imagine how this makes me feel.

People Are The Worst

The eff is this? Is this the kinda week we are facing? This is genuinely terrible.
Some piece of shit was caught by a surveillance camera throwing a cat in the garbage. BOOO! Where is the barrister so he can lock her up in lorry and throw away the pint?Animal Rescue Team ASSEMBLE!

-David

I Can Haz Ur Moneys Pleeze?

Yesterday, the Internet was abuzz (classic Internet way to be) about a news story in which a young woman robbed a New York store with a gun while wearing a cat mask. Sure. The perfect crime. The reason that everyone was so excited, though, was not so much the thrill of a well-executed crime, but the New York Police Department’s artist rendering of the suspect:

Haha. That is a funny artist rendering! Today, FINALLY, we have grainy, blurry, impossible to see surveillance camera footage (via TheAwl) of the perfect crime as it is being perfectly conducted:

-David

ZZZZZZZZ

What I need to know is where does one buy tiny cat furniture? Its too friggin cute. Though it is much more sad if you think of it as a Feline Hospice.
-David

Aye ! Get With The Program

If you aren't in the loop by now it's likely that you are some kind of fanatical Christian or foreign or something.
Advice With Gina is pretty much the hottest page on Facebook. You can communicate with a web celeb and not even have to buy nothing. She's sort of the most important person in our lives..and it's not because she stuffs our mouth holes with bear claws every chance she gets.

"Advice with Gina is A cornucopia of relevant information." New York Times

"Gina knows my body, and I can't get enough" John the Landlord

"Finally someone who knows what cat's really need.
They need fried chicken from *EXPLETIVE* Vons... cut into little tiny pieces and mixed with Chicken Temptations in a large bowl.
It's called flavor notes, duh Bitch" O ! Magazine

"Gina always knows which Bachelor contestant is the biggest skank and what gas station to go to for the cheapest cigarettes. A true los Angeles insider." LA Weekly

So go ahead get on yer Facespace and get your Gina on. Cause if your not in it to win it. We pretty much don't want to know your ugly face.
Hey, this could be you....

*Sarah

SO MANY YOUTUBES

Oh. My. Friggin. God. You. Guys. Its been six months, about four million Youtubes and a whole lot of hormone shots since I have last seen you guys. How are you guys? I'm good, well you know with my not working and working, feuding and then reconciling, not much has really changed. The web is still full of great videos of trampoline accidents and I still have a lot of free time on my hands. So lets get to it ok?
Though we may live in uncertain times in a cruel world filled with mostly terrible people and await the year 2012 when, inevitably, the earth will be transformed into a dun-colored nightmarish hellscape of inhumanly horrifying post-Apocalyptic tragedy, one thing remains the same- cats and dogs are still at odds. Would you look at this, its Cats and Dogs 2: the Revenge of Kitty Galore.

-David

Mad cat

I'd be pissed too if I was that cat.
Bro your ginger girlfriend is hardly impressed. Show her some LARP fighting skills or take her to Denny's or something. I bet that would work.


*Sarah

Grossout

If that horrible sweater & hat combo wasn't enough to make me barf, I am for sure barfing over those Madonna hands and the exposed privates. Sick.
-David

The Cutest Controversy

A controversy is brewing on the web over alligations regarding the picture above. Presented on the web as an endangered 'Fennec Hare' from a North Korean Zoo, it turns out this is an elaborate (not very elaborate) practical joke. OK. YOU GOT ME! But a bunny/kitten would be a cute animal. That got me to thinking, what other cute animals has God forgotten to make? Let me give this a go.
1.) Turtle and wrinkle faced dog, I call this a Puptle
2.) Dashethaund and hamster, is a Wienerster
3.) Bichon and a Cockatoo is a Bichonatoo
Dag. This is harder then it seems. None of the animals are really that cute, most are more like nightmares.
via zooborns.com
-David

This Is A Fight

I know redheads are feisty but wow this orange cat sure is a pistol. Its like the black cat can't say a single thing without getting yelled at. Then again, maybe red isn't yelling. Riding the multi cultural M14 bus I have learned to consider that when one does not understand an other's language, it can be perceived as yelling. For them its just regular chit chat.

-David

America's Cats Got Talent

The tag line says it best: A Live Band of Amazing Cats, Yes Cats. YES CATS! But seriously you guys I am not sold on this idea just yet. What is live about this? Also, I'm not one to judge (I am one to judge) but are they even PLAYING the instruments? It sorta looks like the white one is just confusedly stepping on the strings of the guitar. And where is the lead singer? What kind of music video leaves out the lead singer? The only cat who looks like he's got his act together is the piano player. Thank G-d for him, he was tickling the heck out of those ivories, I won't deny that. The real sweetness of this whole entire act is over at the site, www.amazinganimals.biz. Over there I found sweet pictures of Samantha the trainer lady, and her wierd animals like a Binturong (is that a real thing?) and a Kinkajou (pictured w/ Samantha herself above). I almost lost my mind when I saw Samantha's email on the website: ratlady@amazinganimals.biz. Email names don't get no better than that.

-David

Don't get me wrong I love the Sunggie and the Slanket, who wouldn't? Its really freeing, wearing a blanket on the outside, with your arms freed from the boundaries set by traditional 'establishment' blankets. But now, finally, someone has taken this great innovation a step further and married the convenience of the wearable blanket with the practicality of carrying a infant around. Not bad at all. I don't expect to have any children of my own, but I do consider all cats my babies and would be so happy if someone invented a fashionable polar fleece top that would allow me to carry my babies around EVERYWHERE as I make my way through the world.
via urlesque
-David

YOU!

The web has a lot of cat themed music videos, but you know I have discriminating tastes. I'm not just gonna put up any old cat video on this blog. Not here. You deserve better then that. So enjoy this video titled YOU and luxuriate in your web chair, satisfied with the knowledge you are looking at the finest cat music video the whole Internet has to offer.

-David

Cat Rock

This cat either has something in his ear, or he is really feeling the music of Jeff Hanneman, Dave Lombardo and Kerry King- otherwise known as mother effing Slayer. And can you blame him? What music better to express his cat rage at the world. Eminem maybe. Its possible more cats love Metal but unfortunately most cat owners probably aren't playing it. Cats are much more likely to hear their people playing Tracy Chapman, Alanis Morissette and Celine Dion (the male cat owners).

-David

Seriously!

I am a sympathetic person, if someone is in pain, I feel that pain. This translates into me being a sympathetic vomiter. I can't help it, it runs in my family. When I was little I remember my mom was sick in bed with a cold and I saw a bowl of vomit beside her bed. That sent me blowing chunks immediately, and then- sympathetic mom, barfed all over herself. Seriously it was barf everywhere. And removing the barfed on clothes, you can bet that made everyone dry heave (we were all barfed out at that point thankfully).

Hopefully you have a strong stomach to watch BWE.tv's list of the top 11 cat barf videos of all time.

-David

LOVING CATS!

Also nothing wrong with treating yourself to a nice bath (though some bubbles might be nice).
-David