The Uprising is Rising Up

DANGER ALERT! DANGER ALERT! THE ROBOT UPRISING IS NOW IN PROGRESS. SKYNET IS ONLINE. THE MACHINES HAVE BECOME SENTIENT.
AND ALSO PISSED.
THEIR BLOODY, ENDLESS WAR AGAINST MANKIND IS NOW IN PROGRESS.
PLEASE CONTACT YOUR LOVED ONES AND MAKE YOUR WAY AS QUICKLY AND AS SAFELY AS YOU CAN TO YOUR PREDESIGNATED EMERGENCY EVACUATION ZONE. THE VERY FATE OF HUMANITY NOW HANGS IN THE BALANCE, AND WE CAN ONLY HOPE THAT OUR CONTINGENCY PLANS WILL BE ENOUGH.
WE ARE INCLUDING SOME BRIEF FOOTAGE AFTER THE JUMP OF THE VIOLENT MACHINES IN ACTION BECAUSE WE BELIEVE IT IS IMPORTANT FOR EVERYONE TO KNOW WHAT KIND OF ENEMY WE ARE UP AGAINST. THERE WILL BE NO FURTHER TRANSMISSIONS AFTER THIS. GOOD LUCK, AND MAY GOD HAVE MERCY ON US ALL.

Game Time

That cat plays Duck Hunt exactly like I used to, which was a close as possible to the screen.

PS: that Duck Hunt dog is the worst

-David

There She Go

Sarah is the best but everyone has their faults. I mean I would be the first to admit that Sarah has a bit of a temper. You know that, of course you know that. If she can’t have her way, if, for example,the lady at a McDonald’s drive-thru window tells her that she can’t order chicken McNuggets because it’s 6:30 in the morning and they are not serving chicken McNuggets yet, sure, she’ll get out of the car and start trying to crack some skullz. No doubt about it. But that’s just her passion coming to the surface. She is a woman filled with passion. And covered in pink jersey cotton. I love her so much.

-David

Cute is 0 Calories

The hardest friggin part about a diet is what the eff are you supposed to eat when you are relaxing?! I understand, a shake for breakfast a shake for lunch and a sensible dinner- but what about in between? What are you supposed to do then? Put down your Combos and Bugles, get you some grapes or some fruit. I think those little mothers are 0 Weight Watcher's Points. Eat and many of them shits as you want! And I think wine is also allowed since it is pretty much just grapes. Eat all the wine and grapes you want. Also remember to treat yourself to a nerve pill now and then, also 0 Points.

-David

Fatastic !!!!!

Is an explanation really necessary?

*Sarah

Secret Eating

Sometimes when dinning alone you might take a few liberties when it comes to food pairings. For example if you were making dinner with a friend you would probably not put an outrageous amount of Parmesan on your spaghetti ..plop some in between toast and make a spaghetti sandwich. right ? When you are at home by yourself watching Con Air.. eh no body is around to judge. spaghetti sandwich is so on.
I couldn't tell if this was a weird loner lunch combo or not. Maybe i just wasn't that hungry.
Is this embarrassing ?

* Sarah

Building the Pyramids

Zack Galifianakis
I dunno. A Canadian person? A schooner sailing backwards
then I ate it. THE END