HELLO Its Called Art

There is, of course, the old statistical allegory in which the idea of an infinite number of possibilities is represented by a dozen monkeys (or one immortal monkey, according to Jorge Louis Borges) banging away at the keys of a dozen typewriters for an infinite amount of time will, eventually, through sheer chance, perfectly recreate every book in the British Museum. It is a cute theorem, and it certainly gets the idea across. But I think that we can all agree that a dozen monkeys (or one immortal monkey, or one million monkeys) recording ad infinitum on a dozen (or one infinitely battery-charged, or one million) FlipCams would never come up with half the shit we’re coming up with these days. YOU CRAZY FOR THIS ONE, METAPHORICAL MONKEYS
-David

Hot Cats

Its just like that one Nelly song, it's gettin hot in hur, ima take my clothes off. Hot Cats I hope you guys are not too hot.

-David

Pollock and Pollock

I don't like to make a big thing of it or nothing but I was raised without a lot of the luxuries you guys probably took for granted. We didn't even have cable TV in our house 'til I was in probably 3rd grade.
But I survived, I watched a lot of Golden Girls and Canadian Public Access TV. Canadian Public Access was actually really pretty sweet, most of the people talked normal without those weird accents, and there was a considerable amount of shirtless dancing men (which even at age 6, I wasn't mad at okay how you doin).
This Pollock and Pollock show was really excellent, check out their Late Night Lemonade segment pretty kewl right? And wow Liberace. Its pretty incredible that they were actually able to get him on there. Of course his body is hideously wasted away from AIDS, but how brave of him to perform without a shirt. Make you think ya know.
-David

Jenny Jones II

Look who is now obsessed on the Jenny Jones tip. Me. I am. Why I have I been WASTING my life away, why did I not look up Jenny Jones on YouTube years ago!?! I owe myself a big apoligy. And know what, I forgive myself.
These ~GeEk 2 ChIc~ episodes basically got me through the worst years of high school (all four of them were the worst years). I would sit back and watch these former geeky highschoolers with low self-esteem flaunt the fact that they grew up to be ugly strippers with low self-esteem, and I would feel empowered. I am wack, and I need meds.
-David

CLOSE ENCOUNTERS

Living in New York, I've grown used to seeing celebrities. I have seen that one guy from big brother a few times at my neighborhood coffee shop, and I one time saw former MTV guy John Norris at a gay bar. But at my low rent gym, I never thought I would see a celebrity there. I was winding my own bees wax, doing leg presses when a certain older lady plastic surgery face wearing spandex capri pants caught my eye. Let me tell you what she was THIN. I mean mad thin. Not even Dolly Parton skinny, more like Goddess Bunny Skinny. Anyway after working myself up (and after I convinced myself it was Amanda Lepore) I finally went up to her. I mumbled some stuff that probably didn't make sense about loving her new music video (watch the video, it is kinda sweet). She seemed a little confused but nice enough.
Well the moral of this story is basically: Stars- they're really not just like us
-David

Late Night Monkey

Leave it to the Japanese to make the sweetest talk show ever. Its hosted by monkeys, how can it not be the best? The thing about monkeys is that they are direct. If you give them a cigarette, they smoke it. Give them a talk show, they grab boobs. Its to the point, and I can appreciate that.

-David

A Woman's Touch

Just thought the blog could use some BIG OL BAZOOOMBA'S.
I also liked this gals smile. Norma Stitz