People Are The Worst

The eff is this? Is this the kinda week we are facing? This is genuinely terrible.
Some piece of shit was caught by a surveillance camera throwing a cat in the garbage. BOOO! Where is the barrister so he can lock her up in lorry and throw away the pint?Animal Rescue Team ASSEMBLE!

-David

Ack!

Well now I am pissed and sad.
Cathy Guisewite has announced the end of Cathy.
Ack! Now what am I supposed to read every day? Ack! She was the only one who understood my love of shopping, and how hard it is to find a good man, and how difficult mettlesome mothers can be! ACK!
-David

Meet This Dad

There should be a word for men of a certain age who have decent bodies but not great bodies, who love to take off their shirts at weirdly inappropriate times. Like, if you saw this guy at the beach, you’d probably be like, “For an older gentleman he keeps himself in pretty good shape.” But in this video it’s like, “What are you doing? Where are you getting this confidence from, Mr. Paunch?

-David

Let Her Do It

I don't think this counts as blackface if she isn't IN blackface. Okrrrr! I know thats right.

-David

Sisterhood of the Travelling Spanx

It's hard out there! I know it's hard out there. You just have to keep your head down, and do whatever it takes to get through the day. For some people that means unwinding after a day at the office with a nice ice cold Diet Coke and an episode of HOARDERS. ("I'm just so excited to find out if they are able to let someone clean their house, oh good they were able to!") For some people it's taking a pottery class at the local community center, or swing dance lessons with a teacher found on craigslist who smells like alcohol and plastic. It's like Lil' Kim said before she went to prison for lying under oath: Do what you like! (Except lie under oath, that's perjury and you will go to jail for that.)
This is America!
And OK, maybe you and a couple friends want to dress up and express yourselves in a terrifying caricature of femininity. Maybe you guys happen to sew your own costumes and lip-sync to a CD of Dreamgirls, Music From the Motion Picture. Maybe one of you guys (Sarah) is having a hard time matching her heavy coverage foundation to the skin color on her body, so what, who cares. It's the right of everyone to express herself, do you.
-TRANSformation via dragulator.com
-David

Sex Can Wait

I want to speak directly to the young women out there who aren't afraid to find their own voices and make a difference in this world, where you at my peeps? Yo, you dogs, let me lay down some wisdom for you. Being a virgin is no big whoop. FACT: we are ALL born virgins and plenty of people remain virgins their whole entire lives, so what, who cares, nobody! Being a virgin can even be an asset. Yes its true, put your razr scooter down, take off your walkman headphones and let me tell you about Sarah Jane Newberry. Pictured above right she is a kewl lady from England who has never had sex ever, never in her whole life, even counting anal. Its not like she hasn't had the option, she had boyfriends (check the ex-boyfriend section of the site). But she's chosen not to let anybody put it in her and for her it's worked out well. Look she has a website of her own and everything!
-David

Belt Sword

The best part is the tagline on the Belt Sword website. Never Feel Naked... Never!
I expect this to spawn a whole generation of extremely violent never-nudes.
via Beltswords.com
-David

Grossout

I really struggled with myself on this one, not sure whether or not to post it. But I prayed on it, and decided yes, the world (the 3 people who read this) needs to know about George Kistner and website: louisvillefreeface.com. So you're welcome.
via somethingawful
-David

I'm Gonna Hump That?

This is a clip from a documentary I saw, I think it was on the Discovery Channel. People who sexually love objects! Tupperware, fans, globes, washing machines, spaceships, EVEN THE TWIN TOWERS! Again barriers are being broken, I was under the impression only men were creppy perverts.
Yay feminism!
-David

Juannaman

OK so this lady has set up a site chronicling her attempt to GET A MAN! Someone needs to eff her up with some knowledge:
“A husband” and personal fulfillment are not the same thing.
Get a cat.
via 52weeks2findhim.com
-David

A Woman's Touch

Just thought the blog could use some BIG OL BAZOOOMBA'S.
I also liked this gals smile. Norma Stitz